Name: Sean Wilkinson
Age: 31
City: Portland, ME
Profession: Freelance graphic designer

Lots of people live paycheck to paycheck. I'm one of them, but as a freelancer, my income varies. Right now I'm making more money than I ever have and I still manage to hit zero — or almost zero — each month. It took me a while to recognize this. A couple years ago I was making as little as $1,500 in a bad month, but I still made rent, paid bills, went out with friends. Then I signed with an agency and started getting a ton of work — these days, a good month can bring in $5,000. It occurred to me that my income had grown but things still felt tight. I've got $40,000 in debt between student loans and a car loan, and I make those payments, but savings don't stack up even when more money's coming in.

I'm starting to be aware of my spending, from everyday treats like restaurant meals to extravagant purchases like a new camera, a new television, something from the Apple store. I've noticed I do real-time rationalizing as I'm paying for these big-ticket items: "I shouldn't spend $600, but I did send out that invoice for $2,500 yesterday, so it's okay." In months when cash flow slows, I spend less across the board. I check my balance regularly and can't justify splurges. It's finally dawned on me that when I'm having a slow month I behave responsibly. The more I make the less responsible I am, so net savings is zero. But even though I'm conscious of this, I still have a hard time controlling it.

Do you have a money quandary? A success story? A cautionary tale? We'd love to hear from you. Send an email to editors@bundle.com and include a photo.


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